I am always a little anxious when it comes to letting things go. It's so hard to accept the essence of transience: The thought of death is terrible, and I don't want to lose everything at some point. Do you know these kinds of worries?
How can I ever release people I truly love? How can I love them when I know that I (might) have to let them go some day?
I'm so hurt that I can never forgive certain things.
There is a trick to get these anxieties under control. It will help you significantly in times of stress and restlessness. It’s pretty simple. Say today's date out loud but add another 100 years.
"July 7, 2118"
Think about the failed presentation that caused a little apocalypse in the office. What kind of meaning is it going to have in 100 years? None. What about the fight with your partner over the dirty trash can? It has absolutely no meaning at all. The only thing that may still exist in July 2118 are memories of beautiful things: a dusty wedding photo, a handmade painting or the entrance gate to your garden, which a grandchild or a foreign homeowner surpasses. In a nutshell: everything that was created with love remains. All the other things, such as worries, needs and inner quarrels, will have vanished. It's like they have never even existed.
Although this thought is a bit scary, the month of July 2118 will inevitably come (if no devastating catastrophe occurs). Let’s use it as an inspiration! The longer you dwell in it, the more relieved you are. Time passes anyway, so there’s no need for excessive worrying.
Let’s stretch our bodies, inhale deeply and recognize that our teeny, tiny problems are actually not that bad.
It might be hard to accept but nothing lasts forever. You must let go of all objects and release all love partners at some point in this life. Don’t burden yourself with too many objects. Wisdom teacher Eckhart Tolle warns us of getting lost there.
“That's why people try to pile up all kinds of things to be more of themselves and become more perfect.”
All our possessions will vanish someday. Perhaps we should rather concentrate on our life right here and right now. Roman emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius said a few thousand years ago:
“Short-lived are both the praiser and the praised.”
There is no need to waste our lifetime with too much worrying. We should enjoy this glory called “life” while it lasts. Everything is fleeting – and that's a good thing because that's how you learn to appreciate things.
Here is an example: even though I am crazy about my CHANEL pearl necklace, I am aware that it’s just shaped beads that will lose their color and shine someday. It would be fatal to assign a disproportionate meaning to the necklace. In the end, it’s just a replaceable object.
© Verena Kerwel I my-philocaly.com
I must rather ask myself what the emotional equivalent of my pearls is. This is one of the most difficult questions in life: what do I need for a fulfilled life when material objects and beloved persons are not a legitimate answer? What makes you happy outside of the tangible world? Take your time and think about it for a while. It could be the simplest things.
Read the following examples and get inspired for your answers:
Feelings of satisfaction and warmth
The moment when something long awaited is finally here
Pampering oneself beyond measure – without any reason
Sinking into a soft cushion
Having achieved something big without any help
A very special melody
A simple action that changes someone’s life
Diving tiptoes in cold seawater
Do you want to read more? This is an excerpt of my book Perlen statt Plunder - in English: Pearls of Power. Get your own copy on Amazon and enjoy a light-hearted life. Declutter your home & soul now!